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G T O  h u m o r

Car guys flunk spelling   by Sean Mattingly, who won a spelling bee once in Junior High school

Admit it, some of us car fans weren't always the smartest people when it came to spelling. You know that it was always more fun to work on a car than study some dusty books. If you surf from car page to car page, it's evident that there aren't many bookworms making car home pages. And it's sometimes embarassing to read through a car classified ad because it's evident that the writer probably flunked spelling.

Let's start with the most misspelled car terms:

CONVERTIBLE is right. CONVERTABLE is wrong.
MILEAGE is right. MILAGE is wrong.
LEMANS is right. LAMANS is wrong.
ENDURA BUMPER is right. ENDURO BUMPER is wrong.
VERDORO GREEN is right. VERDERO GREEN is wrong.
CONCOURS is right. CONCOURSE is an open place or plaza where crowds gather.
CAMARO is right. CAMERO is misspelled 65% of the time.
CRAGAR WHEELS is right. CRAGER WHEELS is wrong.
VALANCE is right. VALENCE is wrong.
HOLLEY is right. HOLLY is stuff you hang up at Christmas.
CARBURETOR is right. CARBURATOR is wrong.
CALENDAR is right. CALENDER is misspelled wrong 70% of the time.
SOLENOID is right. SELENOID is heard at many a parts counter!
GRAN TURISMO OMOLOGATO is right. GRAND means a thousand.
CHIEFTAIN is right. CHIEFTAN is misspelled 80% of the time.
EDELBROCK intake is right. ELDERBROCK is wrong.
COLUMN shifter is right. COLUM is wrong.
RALLY wheel is right. RALLEY is wrong.
GRILLE is the thing in front of your radiator. GRILL is the thing you cook hamburgers on!
CONSOLE is right. CONSOUL is wrong, but really funky!
GAUGES is right. GUAGES is wrong. Uh-oh! Sean messes up this one a lot!
GAGE is right too. GUAGE is still wrong.
PASSENGER side is right. PASSINGER is wrong.
The company name PONTIAC HISTORIC SERVICES is right. PONTIAC HISTORICAL SERVICES is wrong.
Oil pan GASKET is right. GASKETTE is wrong, except maybe in France.
Dash PLAQUE is right. Dash PLAGUE would be a terrible dashboard disease.
SHINY things reflect light. SHINNY things look like leg bones.
BRAKES are good to have, BREAKS usually are not. Seen often on e-bay.

Got more words? Click to add some.
 
 

Let's search for books that match the keyword: You can change the words in the search box to be whatever you want.

 
 
 
 
 

What do the letters G.T.O. really stand for?           as sent in by our site viewers
 

Gran Turismo Omologato  (correct)	Generally Trashed Out
Gas Tires and Oil	Going To Ohio
Good Time Out	Good Times Often
Get To Onramp	Get Tools Out
The GreaT One	Get The Others
Good To Own	God Takes Over
Get Turned On	Gets Tickets Occasionally
Grind Tires Off

You might be a GTO freak if...               by Keith MacDonald kmac@vineyard.net

15  1964 is the most important year of your life.

14  The last time you mowed your lawn was so you could push that '67 
    convertible roller from your backyard and into your garage.

13  You know that "flex paint" isn't something body builders use during 
    competition.
 
12  You drive a Nissan Sentra, with no heat, all winter long, so your 
    tri-power '65 won't get road salt on it.

11  A '70 LeMans with Ram Air III? You'd rather see them "clone" Roseanne Barr.

10  When dividing-up your next paycheck you give "goat parts" the highest 
    priority -- just above "food for family."

9  You become visibly upset when you see a website selling an obvious 
   '71 as a "72".

8  You can determine a GTO's vintage while blindfolded, using only your 
   tongue and the dipstick.

7  At the supermarket, you always buy "6.5 litres" of soda -- it just 
   feels right.

6  Your kids enthusiatically discuss your GTO with you for a few minutes 
   before they hand you their report card.

5  You think Polyglas F70-14s were "good tires."

4  You weep openly when you see a rotting '68 hardtop in a field.

3  You weep openly when you see a '74 hardtop... anywhere.

2  You stare at a photo of a '69 Judge for 10 minutes before you notice 
   that tanned blonde in a bikini standing next to it.

1  You think John DeLorean coined the phrase, "Here comes the Judge."

Attention GTO newsletter editors! Go ahead and reprint any of these Text Topics articles. Just give me credit as Sean Mattingly (Sean@UltimateGTO.com) at The Ultimate GTO Picture Site located at http://UltimateGTO.com

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